ask-april-2

Welcome back! This is my “Ask April” series where our blog
subscribers submit a question and I share my best advice.

Today, I’m answering Question #3.

“April, I have had the same job for a long time… almost 12 years. What is the best way to stay “fresh” and not go stale?” FROM: -Anonymous/Business Development in Technology/USA
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Reply from: April
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Dear Anonymous Reader,

Great question! Thank you!

To me, what you are really asking for is “How do I reignite my passion, stay motivated and fulfilled at my job after being there 12 years.”

There are times when we are not feeling fulfilled, or complacent, or if something happens that triggers fear in us that can cause our passion to go down the tubes. But you CAN get your passion and passion back!

There is always a “cause” that creates an “effect” in our life and at our job. So that means there is a reason why you are feeling this way.

The first step is to get clear on the root cause of what’s really going on within you that is causing the situation and feelings at work.

It could be unmet needs. Let me explain…

All human beings have six primary needs that must be met to feel fulfilled, motivated and happier, says psychologist Abraham Maslow in a 1943 paper called “The theory of human motivation”. I’ve heard Tony Robbins talk about these six human needs as well.

 

From my perspective, when one or more of the six human needs are not being met in our life or at our job, this is the root cause behind why we lose our passion (“going stale”) and motivation.

The six human needs are: Love, certainty, uncertainty, significance, growth and contribution.

Love & Connection– We all have a need to love and be loved by others. We desire a sense of belonging and to feel an authentic connection with others.

Certainty– This is a need for safety, stability, predictability, security, order and control.

(For Example: If what you use to do to reach your sales goals at work is no longer working and you keep doing the same things but you still aren’t making your sales goals this can trigger feelings of uncertainty, fear, and even hopelessness and helplessness. At that point, we are faced with a decision to “Do something radically different now” or do nothing different and stay stuck in a “Victim loop” of denial, fear, blame, excuses, judgements, analysis paralysis, perfectionism and avoidance. Choosing to change before we are forced to change is the ONLY way to take our power back create what we do want. No one is going to save us. We have to save ourselves.)

Uncertainty/Variety– The need for challenges, variety, adventure, something different, change, novelty.

The way to have uncertainty or variety is when you you feel challenged at work. Take on a new project, create a new process, contribute new ideas in meetings, and even changing jobs altogether can give us a sense of variety.

Significance- The need to feel special, pride, feel important and feel worthy of love. Your objective is to create a sense of identity.

Feeling significant at work happens when our boss regularly says “great job”. Feeling proud of ourselves for eaching a goal. When others compliment us or talk highly of us. Winning an award. Public praise for our efforts. However, real significance is when we feel worthy and deserving of love with or without external things.

Growth- This is a need for mastery or growth as a human being. You must feel like you are making progress, growing, learning something new and reaching mastery of our skills and talents. Take a class, attend a conference, training, or hire a coach.

Contribution- Service to others. This is a need to feel like we have a higher purpose. When our work becomes something greater than ourselves this gives our life meaning, passion and fulfillment.

One way to feel contribution at work is by embracing the company vision, mission and values. Living those.

But more importantly, you must know what your REAL work is. Your REAL work is not being a “business development manager at a technology company” or “representing cases in a court of law as an attorney” or “teaching 5th graders English” or whatever your vocation is.

Your REAL work is much deeper than that. Your REAL work is your unique process that you do and it helps make other people’s lives better. It’s the thing you do that no one else on earth can do like YOU can. People can only receive this “blessing” (your process) from YOU. You’ve been doing your REAL work (your process) practically your whole life. You’ve done it at every job you’ve had and in every significant relationship you’ve had. It comes so naturally for you, you don’t even recognize you are doing it.

Your job is the VEHICLE for you to deliver your REAL work to other people. Knowing your REAL work gives your life meaning, motivates and reignites passion!

NOW ASK YOURSELF THESE QUESTIONS:
  • Which of these human needs are not being met in my life or at work right now?
  • If I were to be completely honest, what is the real cause of my situation and unsatisfied feelings at my job/work?”
  • How have I contributed to this situation?
  • What change in thinking do I need to make to change my situation?
  • What action step can I make today and everyday to change my situation and create what I do want?
(Listen and write down the first thing that comes to mind. Don’t filter it. There are no right or wrong answers. Then take action to change your situation and feelings today.) 
And that is how to “stay fresh”, reignite passion and stay motivated after being at the same job for 12 years.
Much love,
April
www.aprilyvette.com

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